Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
