She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
