Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
