Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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