i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
