M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
as a side note pls kill me
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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