Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
