im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
