this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
