Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
