my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
