Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
