god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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