I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
