So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I think my moral compass just broke
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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