I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I think I died a long time ago.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Randomize
