Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
