i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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