As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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