Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
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