i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
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