um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
