Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
