I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
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