i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Randomize
