Sponge bath it is.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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