They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
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