You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
