I wish I could teleport
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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