how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
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