i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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