small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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