It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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