He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Randomize
