im having a threesome with these popsicles
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Blood and glitter go together right?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
