So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
pop tarts are not kleenex
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
That was before I lit my hair on fire
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
