Me too!
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
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