this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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