i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
