I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
