i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
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