And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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