after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
