so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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