i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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