i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
