Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I need to sanitize my soul.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
