Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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