I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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