i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
